If you have been following our journey for long, you know that we change our minds constantly about how we plan to get to our child, as many of us in the infertile world are prone to do. We tried on our own. We tried IUI. We tried IVF. We tried donor IVF. We tried immune treatments. We tried the adoption route. None of this got us anywhere as far as an actual living, breathing human but every step is a step closer to our end result.
I wrote a little in my previous post about a surrogate (really a gestational carrier) that was a parent of a child in my classroom this year. She had twins for a couple a few years ago and was getting ready to try again for another family. She approached me about possibly carrying for us later too. I have always wanted to try this because if I truly do have the immune problems that blood tests and RI's say I do, then this could really work! If we take my body out of the equation then the baby wouldn't be getting attacked like a cancer. But my husband had just never wanted to go that route so I reluctantly mentioned it to him. To my surprise he agreed! I guess our rocky road to adoption has helped to warm him up to a carrier. :)
So she recently tried with this other couple's genetic embryo and it failed. This time she tried it with donor eggs and the husband's sperm and she hit the jackpot! First beta was 518.7 and today's was 1652! There's one more beta Wednesday and then the ultrasound is scheduled for July 7. I know this isn't my cycle or even my surrogate yet, but I can't help but get SO EXCITED about the future for our baby now. If she has a singleton, the due date is in February but I'm pretty sure with those numbers it may be a tad earlier with multiples. She said she should be ready to try again this time next year so a year from now we could be starting our own IVF with a carrier! I can't tell you the joy this plan brings me. I don't know if it's because I am more comfortable with fertility treatments because they were my life for so many years or if it's because God is giving me peace in this decision but I'm praying it's a little of both.
So our new plan (although that is always changing!) is to do a fresh genetic cycle next summer. I don't think it will work because I will be 39 by then but we think it would be worth it to try. If that doesn't work then we will try again with a donor. Donor eggs cycles are super expensive, especially when you throw a surrogate into the mix, but donor is our only choice at my age. This year will give us a chance to save up so it's kind of good that we are having to wait.
I would love to hear some of your experiences with surrogates and donor eggs. How do you plan on explaining to your child that dad is their genetic dad but not mom? It will be easy if we are able to use our own embryo but since that isn't likely I'd love to know how to tackle that one. Thanks friends! I'll keep you updated on this pregnancy. Even though it's not for me, I'm so thrilled that another infertile couple is most likely getting their long-awaited dream come true.