Showing posts with label No baby at 34. Show all posts
Showing posts with label No baby at 34. Show all posts

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Unhappy birthday

Brad's birthday was yesterday and he turned 31. His birthday reminded me that my own is coming in 2 months and when I realized this, I started to panic. I'm turning 34. I thought I would be completing my family at this age but I haven't even begun. I know it's not my fault. I didn't plan it this way. But it doesn't change the reality of the lack of time I have. I hope no one will say, "You're still young! You've got plenty of time." The reality is I don't know how much time I have. So far I've had 2 pregnancies in 4 years with no baby to show for it. At this rate, things aren't looking good. Plus it's just a medical fact that egg quality diminishes with time. If I knew this round of IVF would work, I wouldn't care about getting older. But I don't know that and I am actually less confident that it will because of failing last time. I pray this is our time but I don't know. I've gotten my hopes up too many times and always left with the same results-empty arms.